Making the Goal

Isaac and his sweet friend Marissa

Riverton High School's girls soccer team lost last night.  And it was a heart breaker.  Unless you were on the Davis High soccer team.  The irony of the fact that I am writing about girl's soccer is not lost on me.  The last soccer game I remember attending involved me offering my daughter a dollar to kick the ball.  Not to score a goal, just to actually touch the ball.  I still have that dollar.  My oldest son, Isaac hated the sport until last year when, for some inexplicable reason he became Riverton High School's girls soccer team's biggest fan. (Ok, there's your explanation: GIRL'S soccer team)
Riverton had an awesome season this year, with high promise of going all the way to State.  But last night's game was rough.  Still they pulled through to sudden death overtime.  I won't go into the technicalities since I will just sound like a fool, but I know this; it came down to one last shot at a goal.  Isaac's sweet friend Marissa was up.  According to Isaac, she played her heart out and had a great game, but the goal just didn't go in.  Sometimes that happens.  She was devastated.  I'm sure the weight of the team and the season felt like it fell squarely on her shoulders at that moment.  I wasn't there, but the scene breaks my heart just the same.  I don't know Marissa well enough to tell her what's in my heart and I'm sure her parents are on it, but I can't get her off my mind today.
You see, Marissa is one of Isaac's favorite people in the world.   When he was in a scary car accident last spring, it was Marissa he called when he got home and needed to process the whole thing.  She talked to him at 11:30 at night to calm him down.  When he is feeling grumpy or out of sorts, I often find him texting Marissa to sort things out.  I don't know what she says, or if just listening and not saying anything is her trick, but her influence for good with my son is so appreciated.  Isaac loves that she will listen and is always kind and positive- to everyone.  He doesn't give a lot of specifics on why he thinks she is such a great friend, just that she listens and is so kind.  Or as he puts it "One of the coolest people I know."
So the good news today is that there is a beautiful teenage girl out there who didn't make the goal last night, but she makes the goal in life every day.  And that's the one that really matters. 

Name Calling

I have been thinking about my cousin James today.  
Which is funny because we aren't particularly close- James is MUCH older than me.  That's my story and I'm sticking to it.  So we didn't really grow up together.  He was my older kinda cool cousin who found pleasure in torturing us at Thanksgiving.
But today I have been thinking of something he shared at his son's funeral.  As he stood at the pulpit braving the incomprehensible task of sharing his feelings at that unimaginable time, he said something that has changed my perspective forever.  You see, he shared his experience as he drove home from the hospital on the horrible day his little man passed away.  He stopped at a service station for a drink.  As he stood in line, the thought hit him, "None of these people have any idea.  I'm standing here in line with these people and they have no clue I just lost my son."  (At least that's how I heard what he shared)
The thought hit me like a ton of bricks.  How many times have I been impatient with someone because I didn't understand their behavior?  How often to I judge someone based on their actions, not knowing what is in their heart?
Are the names we call others kind?   Do they help or hurt?  During his darkest hour, James taught me one of life's biggest lessons.  We should always help, because odds are the person is already hurting.
I thought of James today because of this wonderful story found in Prodigal Magazine and written by Susan Basham:

Pulling my car into the drive-thru line at Starbucks, I wondered why it was a dozen people deep. It wasn’t raining, yet it seemed everyone was driving through today. I was transporting three dogs to the groomer, and there was no way I could leave two wild Shih-tzus and one crazy Bichon alone while I went inside for my daily dose. Millie, the Bichon, sat on my lap licking the window. As I peeled her away from the glass, I saw the woman. She sat across the parking lot, leaving just enough room for a thoroughfare, as she too was waiting in the Starbucks line. I smiled, and gestured to her. It went something like this: “Are you next, or am I?” Really, I was fine either way. She was not. Thinking I was trying to snag her spot of next up, she gunned her Suburban, rolled down the window, and let out a string of expletives that made me blush. Millie barked back a retort. “Go ahead, please,” I said. “I wasn’t sure who was first.” I pulled Millie back onto my lap, so she could see I had been dog-distracted and truly didn’t know who was next. She didn’t buy it. She continued with the name calling without taking a breath. I won’t write them down here, but the main mantra shared initials with the number one social networking site. 
Then something really strange happened. Instead of getting mad or yelling back at her, a sense of empathy invaded me. I looked at her again, and this time I saw someone different, someone who wrenched my heart. Her eyes were red and puffy. Her hair was pulled back in a natty ponytail. She held her phone in her palm, glancing down at it every few seconds. And she was driving that big ole’ gas hog of a Suburban, my own car of choice when I had three kids at home and a carpool. Dear God. I was looking at myself ten years ago. Same car, same ponytail. Same frustration. We’ve all been there. Dog vomits on the sofa. Both kids have strep throat. The garbage disposal chooses today to break, when you are trying to disintegrate moldy fridge leftovers.  Husband is mad because you forgot to pick up the dry cleaning and he’s going on a business trip. Sound familiar? And by the way, was that him she had been talking to or texting? She gunned forward, just to show me that she could. I left her a wide berth, smiled at her splotchy face. She shot me a sideways scowl, mouthed the mantra again. Pulling up to the loudspeaker behind her, I said “I want to pay for whatever the woman in front of me has ordered. And please tell her I hope she has a better day.” I meant every word. The woman idled in front of me for a good four minutes, talking to the barista who had leaned out the window. She shook her head and handed over a bill. She drove around the side of the building slowly, this time no gunning. Hmmm. “No takers, huh?” I said to the barista as I pulled forward. “Nope. She said she couldn’t believe you wanted to pay for her drink after all the names she called you. She said she couldn’t allow it, and said to tell you she was sorry. She felt really bad.” “Did you tell her I hoped she had a better day?” “Yep. She said thanks— that she already was.” “Good to hear.” I smiled and handed her a dollar to put in the tip jar. As I drove away, I began to cry. Not because I had been called so many terrible names, but because God had answered my very recent prayer—which was that He would allow me to see people as He sees them, not as I see them. That I might be able to see the hurting inside, instead of just the hurtful outside. And maybe a few tears were of gratitude and amazement that He always shows up with an answer when I sincerely ask. 

Joseph B Wirthlin said "Kindness is the essence of greatness and the fundamental characteristic of the noblest men and women I have known. Kindness is a passport that opens doors and fashions friends. It softens hearts and molds relationships that can last lifetimes."
I can't pretend to be as thoughtful and understanding as Susan, but I can try. And I can make sure that the names I call others are the kind I want to be called.

Giving of Yourself...A Tale of Three Kidneys

The following story appeared on KSL News.  I can't take credit for writing it or for the amazing chain of events it tells about.  Luckily, this blog isn't about credit, it's about finding good.  And this story is definitely good!

It seems that so much of our happiness is about service.  As we serve others, we are less focused on ourselves and our problems.  Pretty ironic that as we bring joy to other's lives, we find it ourselves.

These amazing people were certainly blessed as they blessed the lives of perfect strangers...

SALT LAKE CITY — Three people are recovering after receiving new kidneys. What makes their medical procedure so incredible is the connection they share — living donors who came together as part of a paired transplant exchange.

All three received a kidney last week, including Hayley Fershtut’s 2-year-old son, Beckham.
"The people who have stepped up to save my baby's life, it's been amazing,” Fershtut, of Layton, said through tears.
When Beckham was born, doctors discovered his kidneys did not fully develop and were functioning at just 12 percent of what they should be.
"He had a window of a couple of months that we needed to get this done in order to avoid having to put him on dialysis,” explained Dr. Raoul Nelson, a pediatric nephrologist at Primary Children’s Medical Center.
Since the surgery Sept. 11, the little boy is doing so much better, according to his parents.
"He couldn't walk before. He couldn't keep any food down before,” said Beckham’s father, Ari Fershtut, “and now with this new kidney, he should be able to live a very normal life, be able to catch up and walk and run like other kids and go outside and play with them.”
The surgery was dream come true for Beckham’s parents. Ari Fershtut was going to donate a kidney to his son, but they were not a match.
"The kidney was something that we personally couldn't give to him, and I am so grateful to them that will step up and come to give him something that we couldn't,” Hayley Fershtut said.

The toddler’s kidney came from Kristy Buffington, of Twin Falls, Idaho. The 37-year-old wanted to donate her kidney to her friend Brandy Jess, 40, but last-minute tests showed they weren’t a match.
“So I decided to donate to her, and then we came down (in July) and the final cross-match said we weren’t a match, that the first test was actually wrong,” Buffington said.
They were ready to turn around and go back to Idaho when Buffington said they were approached about the paired exchange program. She told doctors she was willing to do the paired exchange only if there was a guarantee that her friend would receive a kidney. After a couple of weeks, matches were found.
Even though Buffington wasn’t a match for Jess, she’s happy she was able to help a little boy.
“It was really awesome to be able to help this little guy at the same time,” Buffington said. “He’s only 2, so that was pretty cool, too.”
While Ari Fershtut, 32, was not a perfect match for his son, he was a match for Juan Romero, 45, of Wendover, who waited three years for a transplant and had been on dialysis. Both men had the same rare B-negative blood type.
“The doctors say the kidney is working very well,” Romero said.
Now, he has a new lease on life, thanks to people he had never met before.
“I’m just grateful I got to help my son, but also help (Romero) as well,” Ari Fershtut said. “It’s a bonus on top of that. It’s great that I got to be a part of it.”

Bartling's gift began a chain reaction that resulted in three people receiving a kidney. His went to Jess, Jess' friend Buffington was a match for 2-year-old Beckham Fershtut, and his dad, Ari Fershtut, was a match for Romero.

Their surgery was performed Sept. 12.
Jess' transplant exchange was made possible by Ted Bartling, 51, of Morgan. He is known as the good Samaritan in the exchange because he has no relation to anyone else involved.
“I’m just some guy off the street that had a weird idea that I would go in and see if I could help somebody other than myself,” Bartling said. "I just knew there was someone that matched."
It took six months of testing and looking for a match, and then the hospital called him to say they found someone he could help.
Bartling said he was feeling great six days after donating a kidney. He had no idea who would receive the kidney, but after the surgery he met Jess.
"(She’s) a mother, a wife, and that means the most to me,” he said.
Buffington said her good friend is making progress and the two of them share a much stronger bond, even though Jess didn't receive one of Buffington's kidneys.
“She is kind of having a rough time of it, but she will make it,” Buffington said. “She is an amazing person. She's got a good, positive attitude, so she will get there.”
But Bartling’s gift began a chain reaction that resulted in three people receiving a kidney. His went to Jess, Jess’ friend Buffington was a match for 2-year-old Beckham Fershtut, and his dad, Ari Fershtut, was a match for Romero.

Two-year-old Beckham Fershtut received a kidney from Kristy Buffington in a paired transplant exchange last week. His father, Ari Fershtut, wanted to donate his kidney but wasn't a match. (Photo: University of Utah Health Care)

"And that way we were able to build a chain and take two incompatible pairs plus a non-directed donor and transplant three patients," said Dr. Jeffrey Campsen, who performed all three surgeries on the donors.
University Hospital was the location where all the kidney donors had their surgeries, along with two recipients. Primary Children's Medical Center was where the surgery on 2-year-old Beckham Fershtut was performed.
Ari Fershtut said the whole process was a great idea.
“Instead of helping one person, six (people's) lives are affected, and it’s a wonderful blessing,” he said.
Bartling said donating a kidney has been life-changing for him, a chance to give back for what he has.
"We really do have to help each other, to make society better, and we have to give more than we take on occasion, and that is how I got to be here. I wanted to give more than I take,” Bartling said. “It’s such a great feeling, just to help.”

Brought to you by the Letter "M"

Sometimes good news comes in an instant. Like a shooting star that appears unexpectedly and puts a smile on your face. Other times there is a long, hard road before that magical moment when the world seems right.

So it is with the Dahls.

Meet Amber, my sweet sister in law. Her first husband made many decisions that caused him to loose two things: his family and his freedom. But this story isn't about him. It's about Amber and her three beautiful children. When Amber's marriage ended, she was left with three children ages four?? and under. 

She moved forward with her life and eventually met someone who loved her and her three kids. Amber and Derek married in 2009. They bought a beautiful home and jumped into family life. Newlyweds + three. 

Fast forward three years and one new baby boy. Amber's ex still sat in prison and Derek was the only Dad her kids knew. It was time to make it official.

 A kind neighbor helped the family get adoption paperwork ready to go and Amber's ex-husband wrote a letter relinquishing his parental rights. But these things take time. Almost two years later, things were finally ready to go.  Amber and Derek were ready to file the paper work and set a court date. The courts understood that families who are seeking to adopt do not like long drawn out processes so the court date was set only two weeks after the papers were turned in. 

Then the miracles began. But we only learned about them after the adoption was all said and done. You see, Amber and Derek are preparing for other major steps in their family. As part of this, their LDS Bishop sent Amber's ex-husband a letter. It was returned because he had been transferred. The second letter was returned as well because he had included a self addressed stamped envelope (Who knew???). The adoption was finalized on a Monday. On Wednesday, their bishop received a call from her ex's social worker. He felt uncomfortable with the reason for the letter and he had demands regarding the letter. He wanted yearly updates and pictures of the kids. He wanted to meet with Derek. The Bishop kindly explained that it was too late, he had already given his permission for the adoption and it was final. The second permission letter was no longer necessary- the kids we no longer his. 

I shudder to think of the results had the timing been a little different. What if the first letter had found it's way to Amber's ex? He could have recanted his letter relinquishing his rights and giving permission for the adoption to take place. He could have fought the adoption and the lives of these sweet kids would have been forever changed. But the letters were returned and the judge saw that this was the best thing for these sweet children. 

The Dahls have always been a family. But with a Judge's signature it is official. And we couldn't be happier. Or more grateful. 

This perfect moment was brought to you by the letter M (for miracles).

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Making a Difference

The Starfish

Once upon a time, there was an old man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing.  He had a habit of walking on the beach every morning before he began his work.  Early one morning, he was walking along the shore after a big storm had passed and found the vast beach littered with starfish as far as the eye could see, stretching in both directions.

Off in the distance, the old man noticed a small boy approaching.  As the boy walked, he paused every so often and as he grew closer, the man could see that he was occasionally bending down to pick up an object and throw it into the sea.  The boy came closer still and the man called out, "Good morning!  May I ask what it is that you are doing?"

The young boy paused, looked up, and replied, "Throwing starfish into the ocean.  The tide has washed them up onto the beach and they can't return to the sea by themselves," the youth replied.  "When the sun gets high, they will die, unless I throw them back into the water."

The old man replied, "But there must be tens of thousands of starfish on this beach.  I'm afraid you won't really be able to make of a difference."

The boy bent down, picked up yet another starfish and threw it as far as he could into the ocean.  He turned, smiled and said, "It made a difference to that one."

adapted from "The Star Thrower" by Loren Eiseley

The above story is one most of us have heard many times, but it hits home for me right now.  

Now that both of my daughters are grown and away from home I often wonder what I have to contribute to others.  How can I make a difference in the life of an other?  For the last 22 years my life has been centered around my girls and my family.  In raising them to be generous, responsible, loving young women, I felt like I was making a difference in my little part of the world.  My goal during that time was to be the best mom and wife that I could be.  

Now, my world and focus have changed.  Sometimes, as I ponder on my life, I wonder what I have to offer the world.  How can I make a difference in the world and in the lives of those around me.  At times I have felt empty, feeling that I have nothing to offer.  I often look at myself wondering if I really have anything to share with those around me.  As I would allow myself to look past the empty feelings and find those gifts and talents I have to offer, I found the answer is a resounding yes!

I have had to take time to think of what talents I really possess.  I am not an artist, a singer, a painter, a writer, or a musician.  I had to dig deeper.  I found that I do have things to share and my goal is to begin to share these gifts more freely with others. I can be a "Star Thrower."  I can make a difference in the world by lifting another.  Small and simple acts like a heart-felt note, a smile, cookies and a hug on a rough day can often be enough to turn someone's day around.  I am now trying not miss these opportunities, for as I try bringing joy to another I bring greater joy in to my own life.

If you would like ideas on how you can serve others, check out the following website.  It contains ideas on how you can lift others through random acts of kindness.  We would love to hear about some of your experiences.

http://www.randomactsofkindness.org/kindness-videos

Finding Perfection

There are times when everything seems to be going wrong in our lives and in the world around us.  During those times we may begin to question if our Heavenly Father is truly there for us and if so, why has he given us so many trials.  At times of struggle we often forget the amazing times and the blessings we take for granted every day.  In today's world we want everything to be perfect.  We want to be perfect and at the same time we want the perfect obedient children; the perfect job; the perfect (spotless) house; and so much more.  Sometimes we are so busy looking for perfection that we miss the little things in life that can bring us so much joy if we slow down long enough to recognize it.

I recently had the opportunity to spend several days at girls' camp with a group of 26 amazing young women from my church.  The girls were 12 to 18 years old.  During the days at camp, I was able to witness perfection.

No, I am not saying the girls were always perfect and that nothing went wrong, but there were definitely perfect moments.

We are blessed to have sweet Berkley in our neighborhood and ward.  When one first meets Berkley, they may recognize her developmental disorder, but will quickly come to know the joy she brings with her.  Berkley also brings perfect moments to this group of girls.  Perfect moments as bright as the smile on her face that can pierce right through my soul.

This sweet 14 year-old loves with a pure Christ-like love and others return that same love to her.  Berkley brings out perfection in the rest of us.  There are many perfect moments I could list, but I will just list two for now.

Perfect moment #1

Berkley is unable to walk on her own and using her walker isn't feasible at camp.  We had a stroller for her, but that too, can be cumbersome on the dirt, gravel and grass.  This was never a problem.  As moments came when she needed assistance getting to the different activities, girls would quickly volunteer to walk by her side, holding her arms so she could walk with them.  No one had to be asked.  No one complained.  They were happy to help this amazing daughter of God.  They simply did it because they love her, and she loves them.

In the Book of Mormon, Mosiah Chapter 2, verse 17 reads, "And behold, I tell you these things that ye may learn wisdom; that ye may learn that when ye are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God."

Perfect moment #2

On the last day of camp we had one more chance to ride horses.  With 26 girls and only 16 horses available, it was decided that it would be Berkley's solo ride.  The girls were told they could come with and watch her as she rode the horse, or they could stay at the cabin and get ready for boating.  All 26 girls chose to walk up the hill to the stables and celebrate this time with Berkley.  They cheered her on as she got ready to ride and then watched and celebrated as she made her solo ride around the corrals and down the trail.  Berkley lit up as she saw her friends supporting her, however, at that moment she wasn't the only light I saw.  As I witnessed these girls celebrate the joy they saw in her, they radiated a light that was undeniable.  At that moment, everything was perfect.  There was no jealousy or discontent, just pure, perfect love.


I am lucky.  Twice a week, because of Berkley, I am reminded to look for moments of perfection.  My life is so easy when compared to Berkley's, yet joy radiates from her. Perfection follows her.

As we go through this life, it can get overwhelming.  We can expect so much from ourselves and those around us.  Our Heavenly Father doesn't expect us to live a perfect life, he only expects us to do our best.  If we stumble, our Savior is there waiting to catch us, to lift us up. As we continue to get back up and continue our journey, we can be perfected through Him.  We need to remind ourselves that life isn't perfect, that we are not perfect, but we can all find those perfect moments.  Write them down, cherish them and go back to them as you struggle through the hard times.  Sometimes remembering a perfect moment, or that perfect smile of a love one can be enough to get us through a difficult day.

“Be Ye Therefore Perfect”

June 1989 Ensign

Christ commanded his disciples to be perfect, even as he and his Father are. But this commandment may seem overwhelming. Some may become discouraged. Others become so worried about achieving personal perfection that they seek for their own glorification rather than for ways to serve others.

Moroni taught that we should “come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, and deny yourselves of all ungodliness; … and love God with all your might, mind and strength, … that by his grace ye may be perfect in Christ.” (Moro. 10:32.)

If we love and serve the Lord and keep his commandments, it will be possible for us to become “perfect in Christ.” We will feel peace and strength, even in times of difficulty or heartache. Our burdens will be easier to bear, and we will be better able to help others bear theirs as well. (See Gal. 6:2; Mosiah 18:8–10; Mosiah 24:14–15, 21; Alma 33:23.)

We can find comfort in our efforts to become perfect from the example of the Prophet Joseph Smith. The Lord once counseled him, “Do not run faster or labor more than you have strength and means.” (D&C 10:4.) Like Joseph, we are not required to do more than we have strength and means to do. Nor do we have to become perfect in all things right now. “We have to become perfect to be saved in the celestial kingdom,” said Elder Bruce R. McConkie.

“But nobody becomes perfect in this life. Only the Lord Jesus attained that state, and he had an advantage that none of us has. He was the Son of God. … Becoming perfect in Christ is a process.” (1976 Devotional Speeches of the Year, Provo: Brigham Young University Press, 1977, pages 399–400.)

Several people in one ward learned about that process by accepting their bishop’s challenge to live a “perfect day.” One young man found that starting the day by reading the scriptures helped his day to be brighter. A woman and her husband found great joy as they visited sick ward members. (See Tambuli, April 1989.)

We attain perfection a little at a time, with the Lord’s help. “We begin to keep the commandments today,” said Elder McConkie, “And we keep more of them tomorrow, and we go from grace to grace, up the steps of the ladder, and thus we improve and perfect our souls.” (Ibid., page 400.) That is our challenge—to begin today.

www.mormon.org

The Girl Who Lived

On Monday we celebrated a birthday at our house.  The celebration was about a week late, but thankfully when the guest of honor is four you can get away with that.  The little birthday girl goes by many names:  we have called her "Pretty Pretty" since she was little.  She likes us to call her our princess; occasionally her siblings resort to the dubious titles of "Supreme Ruler" or "Tyrant".

I love birthdays.  I love passing those milestones with each of my seven kids, a public reminder of the blessing of spending one more year in their lives.  In the mom department I have been blessed with having it relatively easy.  All seven are pretty amazing people.  However, Pretty Pretty's birthday is also my reminder that miracles exist,  that the answer is sometimes "yes", and that on occasion the heavens do open and quietly pour out miracles.

Our Pretty Pretty joined our family on a sunny June day.  Her birth was much anticipated.  It followed numerous miscarriages, and a search for a treatment that would allow us to have the child that we knew was waiting to join our family.  Finding the cause of the problem was a miracle in itself:   Had I experienced the same issues with my oldest three there would have been no known treatment, and my chances of success would have been less than 20%.  I was also greatly blessed to find a doctor who was willing to search for a cause rather than just using my six living children as anecdotal evidence that all should work out eventually. Maintaining the pregnancy required two shots of blood thinner a day, as well as treatment for some other conditions and many weeks of moderate bedrest.

As we arrived at the hospital for her birth, it felt very much like reaching the finish line of a long, arduous race.  Our miracle girl, much anticipated by our entire family, was finally making her debut.  Things progressed quickly and beautifully, and we soon found that I was nearly dilated with minimal pain.  About 10 minutes before it was time to push, things changed drastically.  The cord dropped down below our baby's head, cutting off her oxygen supply.  The problem was caught quickly and  the doctor was in an office just down the hall.  As quickly as humanly possible they rushed me into surgery.  There was no time for sterilization or a neat incision, but they got our baby out in record time.

The heroic efforts by the staff were not quite enough to keep her heart beating.  Since the epidural was not in full effect I could feel the moment they pulled out  my still, silent little girl.  They quietly rushed her to a trauma room for efforts at resuscitation. I have never prayed as hard as I did during those long minutes on that stretcher ride and operating room table. Our much anticipated Pretty Pretty had an apgar score of zero at one minute after birth.  She was essentially stillborn.

 Ten agonizing minutes later a nurse returned to tell us that she was not breathing on her own, but she had regained a heartbeat.  We were given dire predictions about brain damage due to lack of oxygen; all we could do is continue to pray and to rely on Heavenly Father to help our girl.  Thanks to many prayers and a much needed blessing, 24 hours later she was nursing, breathing completely on her own, and was able to move from ICU into my room.  The hospital stay was extended to five days, but that was mostly due to the lack of sterilization (for me) during surgery rather than due to her needs. We took her home the next weekend with a little bandage over the cut on the side of her head  from the quick work with the scalpel that saved her life.  Like Harry Potter, under her honey colored hair she still carries a little scar that reminds us that she was "The Girl Who Lived".

I type this out with some hesitation.  I am painfully aware that when waiting for a miracle, the outcome isn't always exactly what you might wish.  My first thought goes to the parents of two little boys lost in infancy, so very much missed, who did not receive the miracle that we did.  Both sets of parents have strengths that we don't have, and deserved to raise their miracles as much or more than we deserved ours. I have met many other dear friends over the last few years who have lost little ones.  Circumstances vary, but the pain is always far reaching and life changing.  I continue to hope and believe that the day will come for a joyous reunion, and the long years of grief will seem as a small moment to those who have endured it.

This week, though, I am especially thankful that the answer is sometimes "yes", that miracles do happen, and that four years ago we were on the receiving end of a huge one.  And the predicted brain damage?  The only possible residual effect we have seen in this  quick, feisty, generous little girl is that she tends to faint when she cries hard.  We will take it.  Miracles still exist, and every day I am grateful for this one.

Happy Birthday, Pretty Pretty!

(Pretty Pretty with her cousin, whose birth was a miracle in its own right)

Two Words

Two Words...

Tiger's Blood.

Or if that isn't your flavor:

Shaved Ice.

Yum.

It's a little treat we only get once or twice a year.  But when we do, it puts an instant smile on my face.  We all have our "things".  Those little pleasures that seem to brighten any day.  So share!  We want to know!  What are your two words?  

Life is Hard... and Good

My kind of memories...

It's been a while since I've contributed to our blog. But I have a good reason and, although it may not seem like much of a topic for Lemonade Stand Sisters, I feel compelled to share.  And I promise, it will fit.
Two weeks ago yesterday, my sweet niece passed away.  I won't say we "lost" her because she isn't lost, we know right where she is.  Kayla left behind a broken hearted family including two beautiful daughters.  My heart still breaks when I think of her and even more so when I try to imagine the pain her husband and daughters are feeling.  And the hole left in the hearts of her Mom, Step Dad, sister and brothers.  It has been heart wrenching.  But there is good news.  Lemonade.

First, we are still standing.  Which is no small miracle.

Second, through all this, we found moments of happiness and joy.  A family that had been apart far too long gathered together.  And those who couldn't travel to Colorado, found their own ways to be there.  Denny, drowning in work, held down the fort at home so I could make the trip.  As did my brothers-in-law.  His brother Derek and his fiance' couldn't make it either.  But they supported us all with their love and they worked to make it so their Mom and I could fly which made the trip much easier on Colleen's broken neck.

We gathered and we laughed.  And cried.  We released 25 pink balloons for Kayla - one for each year she lived.  We made rainbow cupcakes because Kayla loved them.  (We made a mess in the process because that's how I roll).  We gathered for meals, enjoying Udon soup made by Kate.  We had quiet conversations and expressed words of love that are often left unspoken.  And we laughed.  It felt so good to laugh.  To remember happy times.  And create more happy memories even in hard times.
One of my favorite memories is pictured above.  About half the family hit the road Wednesday morning for the drive back to Utah.  Bret and Kate were waiting for their evening flight as were Colleen and I.  After a lovely bowl of Pho, we decided to "fill in the cracks" with frozen yogurt.  Because we're such nice people, we decided to each take a picture of our adventure and text it to those on the road.  Separately.  The first text was sent.  The reply: "Aw, miss your face!"  Then the next text.  And the next.   By the time the last text was sent the replies were not so sweet, something about breaking their hearts.  There may have been threats.  Then the promise of a do over in Utah.   Still makes me smile.

So here we are and another week has gone by.  And the tears still come, but the smiles are more frequent.  I feel so grateful for the new memories made.  There is truly an opportunity for Lemonade in everything.  And it felt so good to find it.

Releasing a balloon for her Mommy...

Some Vacation!

'Tis the season for family vacations!  My husband and I are into throwing in as much science and education as we can.  Someone asked one of our girls the other day if they ever relaxed.  My daughter told them, "this IS relaxing!  We do science projects for fun!"

When I saw the story below, it made me smile.  It is a vacation after my own heart. :)


 Prehistoric Vacation

Angel Flight

It is so refreshing to find a happy story in the news.

This week KSL shared a story about Angel Flight West.  Angel Flight is comprised of pilots who donate free air transportation in response to health care and other compelling human needs.

The story shared on KSL was about a young girl, Taleah, from St. George.  Taleah is suffering with leukemia. Traveling the distance from St. George to Primary Children's Hospital for chemotherapy is too taxing on her body, and the cost of airfare is too high.  Luckily, they were introduced to Angel Flight.

Salt Lake City pilot, John Trentman, donates his time and plane to help in cases just like Taleah's.  This army of pilots make it easier on these sweet patients and on their families.  I can not imagine the worry a mother would have as she makes the five hour drive to get her daughter chemo, knowing that she then as to make the return trip with a child who is now struggling with the effects of that chemo.  What a blessing these pilots are to the families they serve.

To see KSL's article, you can visit http://www.ksl.com/index.php?sid=25450797&nid=148&title=pilot-mixes-work-with-charity-to-help-young-cancer-patient

For more information on Angel Flight, please visit http://www.angelflightwest.org

For My Sister...

I have pretty amazing sisters.  You only have to meet them to know the kind of people they are.  One, despite struggling with fertility issues has raised two incredible daughters, and is willing to lend a hand in mothering the children she knows and loves without bitterness or jealously. My kids are so lucky to have her, and so are all of the young women in the youth group she leads.

My other sister is balancing much on her plate right now.  Due to serious illness of a family member, she is balancing the needs of two households, as well as caring for another extended family member recently hurt in a car accident. She also serves on the board of a local charter school, and balances it all remarkably well. Today she received news of a tragedy in her extended family.  Those strong shoulders, already carrying so much, have one more burden.  I wish I could carry some of it for her.  I wish I knew how to make the burden lighter.  We all know those times when the sun seems so far from shining.  My remarkable sister, so very full of faith, hang in there.  The sun is just over the horizon.

Summer Inspiration

As summer comes I look forward to the warm weather, camping, barbecues and spending time with family and friends.  As I anticipate this summer's activities, I also reflect on stories from past summers.  The following story continues to inspire me.

Brighton Girls' Camp is a camp run by the LDS church for girls who are 12 to 14 years old.  The camp is staffed by young ladies who are typically 16 years old to their mid 20's.  Brighton is located in Big Cottonwood Canyon in Utah, nestled among the trees, hills and boulders.  It is beautiful, but not the easiest location for a young girl who is confined to a wheelchair.  

In 2012 the leadership of Brighton was asked if there was a way they could accommodate a young lady in a wheelchair at camp.  The request was that she be able to enjoy one day at camp.  As it was discussed, they were determined to find a way for her to not only join them for one day, but the whole week.  They knew that they could find a way.

When her week came, she did stay the whole week.  The girls in her group were happy to help her and all of the staff was there for her as well.  She was enjoying a week of being a Brighton camper.  Near the end of the week, her counselor asked who in their group wanted to go on the sunrise hike.  Nearly everyone in the group raised their hands, including this sweet girl.  The hike is tough.  Girls have to get up hours before dawn in order to make the climb to one of the highest peaks in the canyon to view the sunrise.  Hiking  in the dark with little sleep is hard on even the strongest girls, but how would they accommodate a girl who was confined to a wheelchair?

Her counselor, other staff members and the camp president discussed it.  They knew it was the right thing to do and they had to find a way.  The staff knew what they needed to do, "We will carry her."  And they did.

They trusted in each other and in their Heavenly Father to get them and this sweet girl up the mountain.  When one's strength would start to fail, another would step up and continue to carry her.  They didn't let her feel like she was a burden, but a blessing.  The joy they must have felt when they reached the peak!  They said that the joy she radiated was amazing and lifted them and gave them enough strength for the trip down the mountain.

While watching the sunrise, she was free.  She was able to sit at the peak, crawl to her own special rock and view God's masterpiece.

Every time I see this picture, it touches my heart.  Yes, that is her out on the rock, enjoying a view she never thought possible.  I can't imagine the courage and faith it must have taken for her to even raise her hand the day before.  And the faith the leaders had as they said yes.

"Don't limit yourself and don't let others convince you that you are limited in what you can do. Believe in yourself and then live so as to reach your possibilities. You can achieve what you believe you can. Trust and believe and have faith." ---Thomas S. Monson

What One Kid Can Do...

Well,  today has been one of those days at my house!   We started out the day with one child having an allergic reaction to a bug bite, and ended it with a flat tire on the way to a school concert. If I had list of favorite days, today probably wouldn't make the cut! 

In the middle of the whirlwind, though, I spent some time at my kids' school reviewing the  service projects of some pretty amazing sixth grade students.  Each student spends 30 or more hours on a project of their own design, serving in a way that they consider to be important.  I agreed to take on this endeavor five years ago.  When I first approached various charities, looking for things that an 11-12 year old kid could do to make a difference, I met a lot of skepticism.  I heard a lot of talk about minimum volunteer ages, liability, and other obstacles that seemed nearly impossible to overcome.  As I look back over that road, it is hard for me to believe what these kids have accomplished since those first discouraging days.  This year the group of 53 sixth graders and 5 honors ninth grade students has completed over 2800 hours of self-directed service.  I thought I'd leave you with a list of some of the little miracles I have witnessed over the last five years.

What one kid can do:

One kid can fill a truck with clothes and supplies to send to families on a Hopi Reservation.
One kid can make enough dog treats to pay for the training of a police dog. (The dog is famous now.  You can find him here: http://www.wvc-ut.gov/index.aspx?NID=1137 )
One kid can make six dolls and 23 doll hospital gowns for doctors and nurses to use in communicating with kids about procedures at the children's hospital.
One kid can sell enough handmade earrings to raise over $800 for the local Women's Shelter.
One kid can earn enough money to support the education of a child in Guatemala for a year.
One kid can gather over 200 books for kids in homeless shelters to take with them as they move into more permanent housing.
One kid can develop a club to help younger girls develop self esteem and positive social skills.
One kid can knit and sell enough hats to provide an entire Christmas for a family of five whose parents were both stricken with cancer.
One kid can clean the grafitti from neighborhood parks and fences.
One kid can perform much needed yard work while reminiscing with a local veteran.
One kid can gather over 140 pairs of shoes to be sent to Haiti.
One kid can volunteer for the Dyslexia Center of Utah because she has struggled with dyslexia herself and knows how important it is.
One kid can  gather used sports equipment to be sent to kids in South America.
One kid can sew pillowcases for  25 children with cancer.
One kid can  begin a robotics program to teach engineering skills to kids whose parents have been incarcerated.

 It was not many days ago that I last heard someone comment on how the next generation has a sense of entitlement and no work ethic.  For some kids, that may be true.  Mixed in among the masses, though, are some incredible kids who are changing the world one little problem at a time.  It is a privilege for me to have the opportunity of standing at the sidelines and cheering them on. I'm still waiting for one of them to offer to change my tire for me, but in the meantime I am grateful to know that where it really counts,  one kid can change the world.

-Debs

Video-bombing

Even if you aren't a baseball fan, these guys are sure to put a smile on your face.  And for those who love baseball and a good video bomb, it's a bonus. Enjoy!  (posted for Pam)

Memorial Day Snowball Fight

I am switching it up a little today.  The news this weekend was full of car accidents and tragedies.  Unfortunately, our family did not escape the trend of accidents this weekend.  Pam's son, Isaac, was in an accident.  Luckily he and his friends walked away without any serious injuries.  The night and the accident were full of miracles.  I will leave you in suspense and let Pam post more information when she is ready.

As for the happy post, I thought I would give you a peek into our lives and what we enjoy doing as a family.

Growing up with 5 siblings, we didn't have money for extravagant vacations.  Instead, we would pile all of the kids in the truck and camper and head to the mountains or down to our family farm in Fremont, Utah.  We grew to love the beauty and peace that can be found in the mountains.  This love has continued and we are now passing that love on to our children.

For most of our family, Memorial Day was spent in the mountains this year.  Pam and Debbi spent time with their kids up at Snowbird.  My youngest, Whitney, went hiking with friends.  Brian, Chelsea and I headed up Big Cottonwood Canyon.  We decided to go for a walk around Silver Lake.  As we got to the north side of the lake we had to walk across snow.  Being one of those obnoxious moms who always has her camera out, I had Chelsea pose for a picture in the snow.  The snow was a little too tempting for my adventurous 21 year old.  Next thing I knew, a snowball was flying over my head, straight at her dad!  We had a great time hiking, unsuccessfully looking for moose and enjoying being a family.

We concluded our trip up the canyon parked in the Brighton Bowl looking for my ipod.  My dear husband decided that a good hiding place was in the compartment that covered the lighters/power supplies in our truck.  Unfortunately, when the cover is closed, it works kind of like a laundry chute, sending my ipod into the vast unknown behind or under the dash board.  Our search was unsuccessful.  Fair warning:  never try to store anything in said compartment.  You will have much more success using compartments that are actually meant for storage. :)

Have a great week!  If you have any good news or happy stories you would like to share, please send them to us.  We are always happy when others share their "lemonade" with us.

A Real Lemonade Stand

I saw my first lemonade stand of the season yesterday.  I was dropping my son off at his friend's house when we noticed some kids we know from school with their card table and sign.  We waved and I continued on to our destination, telling my 16 year old that he and his friend should visit the lemonade stand.  On the way home I picked up a couple Otter Pops from the kids.  A screaming deal at 25 cent a piece.  They may or may not be sitting melted in the car.  I still haven't decided which was best, their happy faces when I stopped or my happy heart when my 16 year old texted me to say he and his friends had paid them a visit.

Good Samaritan meets Love Story

So this couple is hiking in Washington State when the wife looks over just in time to see another couple together on a mountain ridge, sharing a moment they will want to remember forever; their engagement.  As the guy drops to one knee the onlookers pull out their camera.  Lucky guy, she says yes.  Even luckier, Geoff  had his camera handy.  Once he had the picture, Geoff knew he needed to get it to the couple.  Thanks to social media, one friend told another friend until the couple was found and their special moment was theirs on film- or disk.  You know what I mean.  What's better and a Good Samaritan story crossed with a love story?  Not much! (Source: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2329204/Photographer-stumbled-couples-mountaintop-proposal-tracks-pictures-special-moment.html)                                                              

A Little Good News

Today was a sad news day.  Again.  So Becky had this brilliant idea that we should start sharing some good news or something uplifting with the world.  Well, I know a good idea when I hear one, so I got on it tonight - possibly to avoid the Board training I'm supposed to be doing.  And I volunteered Debs.  Lucky girl.  So here we are and the good news is hard to find, but it is there, all you have to do is look.